The speaker asked a piercing question that zeroed in on its intended target:  my heart.

"Do I let the fragments and particles of the world collect on my soul?"

Starting with an analogy, he shared, "My wife wondered why her plant wasn't growing right. She went to get advice from a gardener who told her that if she dusted the plant it would be able to get the light it needed and grow better." Sure enough the trick worked.

He compared this dusty plant to our lives. Thought provoking questions followed.

By leaving unconfessed sin alone to accumulate, do I keep from receiving the light God has to share?

Do I dismiss the little things, thinking that they alone can not hurt my walk with God — only to turn around and find that a whole impermeable layer has formed?

Do we let the little hurts and ugly words add to that layer, adding them to our baggage rather than brushing them off and forgiving the source?

John 8:12 "When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, 'I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.' "

Shortly after this talk, I attended a garden party at a friend's house. This friend has over 200 species from around the world planted and labeled with both botanical and common names, from lamb's ear to this really huge red Hawaiian looking thing that I wouldn't have imagined growing here in PA.

The front of the house is a small ranch on a shady tree lined street. You might even pass this little sampling of God's incredibly diverse world if you didn't know where to look.

Walking through the garden, you become aware of bees buzzing busily on a particularly favorite ornate purple flower, flowers in transition with some fading and some starting to bloom, and a tiny train circling a miniature display of unique varieties running through the center oval. His flowers bloom from March to November, taking a much needed rest in the winter.

This friend shares openly his own prodigal son stories and his incredible faith through many of life's trials, beginning with the pressures of a being a pastor's kid to drug and alcohol abuse to a failed marriage and broken relationship with his son. He now has a lovely wife but it took him many years to shake off the dust, receive the light of the Lord and move on. He still faces trials but now he can do so with hope and peace. His garden is his testimony of God working in his life and he is now sharing with others.

With these two botanical blessings, I felt the Lord giving me some very important pointers regarding issues in my own life: Forgive, let it go, move on. I will admit I am not the greatest duster in the world and I do tend to keep things in piles to deal with later, including emotions. I enjoy knowing I have the Holy Spirit who gives me the strength to get out the polish and start shining up my soul so that there is nothing stopping the light from getting in or shining right back out.

Have you seen your spiritual feather duster lately?

Is your job satisfying? Do you use your talents to make a living or are they hobbies after the work day is done? Have you ever thought you might have a talent in something only to find out it would only ever be an interest and no actual talent materialized or on the other hand, maybe it took working at that interest for it to become a talent? Have I totally confused you now?

Why do I ask? When people are in transition, from college graduates to career changers to retirees, they have to start down a list of questions such as follows:

1) What do I enjoy or what are my interests?
2) What am I good at or what are my talents?
3) What do I want to work at until I am good at it? (i.e. more classes or training or internship on top of what you have already spent either a college career or a lifetime learning)
4) What am I motivated to stick with?
5) What will keep me until I am good enough?

Sometimes this time of transition is met with several jabs at finding what is right. There is no harm in that except perhaps some hurt pride when things don't work out. God gives us all talents and skills but sometimes we have to put out several fishing rods to see which bait comes back with some fish.

I can relate to this state of transition because my kids are old enough that I want to do something part-time to help with the rising costs of the economy. I started back into the workforce a couple of years ago with a wonderful  part-time job as a development director at a pregnancy center. It was mostly from home and incredibly fulfilling even it wasn't a high paying salary.

When we moved, I decided to try the full-time routine. I am somewhat sad to say that I couldn't handle it and honestly did not want to handle the stress of being out of the house 60 hours a week. I liked the title and the idea of being that person but when push came to shove, I was crying almost as much as I was working and we were all miserable. Definitely not the right fishing pole to grab even though it had the biggest fish. It about pulled me and my family under the  murky water. No belly of a whale for me, thank you.

Sometimes I believe God lets us have what we want to prove to us that it is not what we need. I left that job for another office job where I do not believe my boss was an honest man. As of last December, I could no longer represent him in the community and feel right about myself. The hours were flexible and the pay good but it compromised my belief system and I had to decide. This fishing pole was a crooked one.

So, I love being at home again but the bills are rising and I am looking around. Don't get me wrong, I have loved being at home. But, now, I am interested in writing or teaching or both which I feel just might meet my needs as a creative individual and those of my family as wife and mother. I was reading the Children's Writers Guide and there was a wonderful article about feeding your art or your commerce or both. Are you fitting in your writing after work, are you writing for a living or are you doing a job that gives you food for thought and allows you to work and write and make a living? I like the last one. 

Time will tell which fishing pole vibrates with the excitement of the possibility. It will still be up to me, with the strength and wisdom of the Lord, to reel it in and cook it up to reap the benefits. In other words, once the opportunity arises, I still have the dirtiest work to do – the commitment to sticking with it and seeing it through. I know God has good things for me and for you. Time will reveal its secrets and I look forward to looking back and sharing His faithfulness through it all.

"Trust and obey for there is no other way to be happy in Jesus but to trust and obey."

(Don't forget: When you invest your talents wisely, the interest compounds in multiple ways.)

Today I found out that there is a time to listen and a time to . .. be someone else?

The bulk of my day (9AM to 3 PM to be precise) was spent in my first day of training as a volunteer counselor for a crisis pregnancy center. I was inundated with wonderful Biblical truths to share with hurting young women someday. I felt inadequate for everything I would need to remember and communicate when a client would really need it. Fortunately, I know that the words will come out as needed when needed as long as I listen to what is being taught and of course, pray. The fellow trainees were wonderful women. It is amazing how time and again you really bond with those who go through any type of training with you, especially when you are both new somewhere.

At the end of the day, I came home, got all dressed up, and went downtown for an "Audition Techniques" class where I would learn how to audition for the camera. I was told I was a natural only that, yes, ladies and gentlemen, drum roll please . . . my voice squeaks! What? I emphatized, emoted, and elevated but I couldn't get the lines out without rising my voice to the decibel of a field mouse right in the middle of my lines about American Greeting cards and my quirky brother "Larry". How embarrassing! Oh well, there are always the next 7 classes to mortify myself even more. Actually, it was all really fun and I can't wait for next week! Maybe I will meet someone famous (inside me!)

What a day! Lots of learning and my head is about to explode. Kids are in bed (barely) and hubby is getting ready to go away. I was so proud of him tonight. He made the kids chicken nuggets but actually cracked old Betty Crocker for homemade BBQ sauce that was pretty darn good, even on cold chicken (which it was by the time I got home!) I love my hubby!

Today Carmel my dog woke me at 6 AM as always. Only, today was a holiday and I would have looooved to sleep. She needed to go out but more importantly, in her little mind, was the precise cup of dry dog food waiting for her when she came back from a quick jaunt on the green rubber coated chain that keeps her from running into the field.

Running to the bowl, my dog ate as if orphaned and starved which she obviously is not. Later when my daughter was showing her sleepover pal tricks with the dog, again she ate, as a beagle is known to do, as if she had never seen food before. Even moments later when I gave her some of our unsuccessful dinner meat (more on that later), she ate like I had given her nothing that morning and looked up wanting more and more.

In the last three weeks, I realized I have felt like Carmel, devouring opportunities to grow and learn. I know God has me on a journey and He is calling me to strive for excellence, to be someone I haven't been before and to rise to the challenge. I go in fear and trembling because the process of being used by God is not always a comfortable one.

"Hey, God, I didn't sign up for trials," yells my subconscious mind. The greater thing, though, is that by devouring the opportunities to learn and praying all the way, I know that God is in control and whatever path  or doorway opens, He will carry me through. I know that the fire and trials burn off the dross and out pours the beautiful shimmering gold.

"Okay, God, bring them on."

This last weekend, I attended a business of acting seminar to learn more about the process. Apparently with the massive state incentives and huge production studios being built locally, this area is about to explode in acting opportunities from industrial training films to feature films to commercials, etc. While I don't plan on making it my life occupation, but instead my avocation, my girls and I might just have a little fun with this.

The head of the casting company taught the seminar. I entered the training room expecting a somewhat cocky, full of himself fellow who specialized in the overly dramatic. Instead, I met a wonderful, thoughtful man who immediately introduced himself as "spiritual" to the class.

A major point the director made was to take it one step at a time and see where it leads you. You will go where you were intended to go. Don't get upset with things that don't work out. He had plenty of things that hurt when they didn't work out but then had plenty that did work out.

After three intense hours, the director ended the class with the statement "Be bold. Follow your dreams. Magic happens." Wow. I think I had better get that headshot now. (No, not as in getting my head examined, but really having a portrait taken and being ready if and when God opens a door or window. Heck, I would take a dog flap.)

Above all, I want to pursue righteousness and devour what God would have of me in the middle of all the other experiences. I never want to lose sight of the One who made me who I am. My constant prayer is "God use me, in spite of me." I believe that if I can make sure to be devouring the word of God just as Carmel devours every bite that comes her way, I will be ready when He calls. And, if I am not, He'll carry me through.

Oh, I promised to follow-up on my unsuccessful dinner. Apparently, the grocery outlet I went to the other day stocks some off-flavors that perhaps haven't been successful in normal stores. Apparently, lemon-lime marinated turkey breast was not successful with my children either.

"Children, just eat it," said I, as I made faces about it to my husband who didn't touch his. When I mentioned where it came from, it placed an immediate negative impression in my family's mind making me wish I had kept my mouth shut, full of marinated turkey meat.

This morning, I made pancakes that tasted a little different from the usual Bisquick pancake mix. Immediately, my daughter groaned, "These came from the cheapo store, didn't they?"

Laughing heartily, I said, "Just eat them." They were perfectly fine. My family needs to eat foods that don't taste exactly like what they are used to eating.  Lesson learned on the turkey was that there will be some things you try that are for the dogs. Other things will be the keepers.

I am tasting life in a whole new way and I love it!